Welcome To My Refuge Spot

Welcome Friends to my blog about single motherhood and living for God. I hope that you find my thoughts and musings thought provoking and in alignment with God's word. Thank you for visiting and please feel free to share your comments and pass the word along to others who you feel could be blessed!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

New Spot

Just in case you have been wondering where in the world I have been lately??? Well, I am now posting on my new blog. I plan to post here from time to time, but for time's sake I will be primarily posting on my new blog:


Pics and video will be posted there. See ya at the new spot!!

mrs. thomas

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Checking In

Hello All,

I am not sure if anyone will have the chance to read this message or not, but I wanted to report that all is well with my life as a newly wed. It is the most amazing experience I could imagine. I am forever grateful to God for blessing me with such a wonderful husband. The wedding was all that I could imagine and more because God was there with us. And we are finally able to relax on our honeymoon in our quiet, and beautiful smokey mountain cabin in Gatlinburg TN. Thank you for all your prayers and encouragement. I hope to post more sooner when I can come up for air;)

ps: I also have this posted on my new blog A Marriage After His Heart

mrs. thomas

Monday, June 9, 2008

5 Days and Counting

I can hear the virtual ticking in my ear as I race around finalizing wedding plans this week. I keep getting asked the "are you nervous yet" question, and as of today I'm not so much nervous about the marriage as I am the wedding ceremony. I want this day to be as beautiful as possible as so many people have invested so much in it. I feel truly blessed. I had a total of four bridal showers and I walked away from each one feeling loved and the genuine excitement from all those who have been waiting just as anxiously as I have for this day. I am feeling a level of excitement that is indescribable and exhilarating.

I may not have much time to blog this week as there are so many final details to be done so keep me in your prayers I will try to post before the end of the week. Have a blessed day!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Catching Up and Another Idea Solicitation

Once again I have been horrible at maintaining my blog. As you can see by my trusty counter to the right there, I only have 10, yes 10 days before my wedding. As you can probably imagine my life is a little hectic and fast paced at this point. Next Wed will be my last day at work for a couple of weeks and I have a ton of stuff to do there before I leave to ensure that the building doesn't collapse in my absence. I also have other last minute bridal stuff to do, and I'm failing pretty miserably at it. Nonetheless, none of this peril moves me. I am still happy, excited, nervous, motivated and looking forward to the end of this process and the beginning of my new life.

Even more excited than I am are my girls. They are over the moon and I am glad that they witnessed this process. I do wish that I could have had them the "right way", but since I didn't we have just made lemonade out of our past lemons, and I must say that it is sweet.

I do have a bit of advice to solicit. I am looking for reception ideas. My reception will be void of the traditional worldly fare, but I plan on making it a fun, energized, and happy Christian affair. Being that my creative juices are drying up right now, do any of you have any ideas of some things that we could do besides eat, drink and be merry.... I have music, we have the toasts, the cake cutting and all of that stuff, but I want something more, especially since we won't have the dancing. I really would like to send a message that gathering together to enjoy Godly fellowship and celebrate a holy union doesn't have to involve drinking and dancing and hooking up. Any insight will be most valuable. Have a blessed day!

Friday, May 30, 2008

Makeover Challenge Winner- New Blog Name!!!

Well folks, I planned on making my announcement tomorrow, but I have a ton of last minute wedding stuff to do, and did not want to accidentally not post. So we have a winner for my makeover challenge. It was so hard to decide but we felt like we wanted my new blog name to represent the desires of our marriage and so with out further ado ***drum roll please**** SingleMomForGod will officially change names after June 14, 2008 to:

A Marriage After His Heart
submitted by Kysha, from Love's School
This name has so much of a deep meaning, not only do I want a marriage after my husbands heart, but a marriage after God's heart. I believe deeply that as long as we both strive towards this desire, our family desires and everything else naturally will fall into place. There may be some bumps and the journey may prove to be rather adventurous nevertheless I look forward to all it has to offer. I especially look forward to sharing my experiences with you. Thank you to all who participated.
Kysha, email me so that I can have Amazon send the gift card to you, and give you more details.
Have a wonderful and blessed weekend!

Thursday, May 29, 2008

That's Not My Reflection Is It?

Lately, I have been in a bit of a tizzy. I will admit that I have somewhat evolved into a baby bridezilla. No, not the full fledged fire breathing, demanding, one, but a pure baby sensitive, thin skinned, frustrated, toddler bridezilla. The funny thing is that I had no clue that I was turning into a little baby monster. I would sit and watch that show cracking up thinking man, I'm glad I'm not bossing people around and just being mean. However as truth always has a habit of coming to light I found that I was being a big baby. I was allowing myself to become overly frustrated which makes me uber sensitive, whiny, and withdrawn and I wan't as friendly as I was thinking I was. As hindsight would have it I could have been less frustrated if I had not alienated (unintentionally) some very dear people in my life and baby bridezilla would have never been hatched. But God is always faithful to show us ourselves even when we don't want to look in the mirror, or even if we are semi blinded by our reflection.

Sometimes its hard to see little flaws, even when people are pointing them out to you. Thankfully God has a big old magnifying mirror which shows you all of the little flaws, open pores, and developing blemishes that we mere mortals don't always seem to have a keen eye for. Really, its a blessing to get a reality check from God. Why? Well he really doesn't have to let us know we have spinach in our teeth. He could let us walk around thinking we are just the cutest little Christians all the while we could have a little bugger that is oblivious to us, but obvious to others. That's the kind of friend God is, and I am eternally grateful that he loves me enough to let me know that I "aint" always as cute as I think. I am also greatful that I humbled myself and allowed myself to see the reflection in the mirror before it was too late. Bridezilla could easily grow into Wifezilla, and God knows that's not who I ever want to be. I thank him for showing me my flaws and giving me an opportunity to die out to those flaws so that I don't take them into my marrige. The truth hurts but I would rather it hurt me now, than for me to hurt my husband later.

I have to dedicate this post to all of my friends that are involved in my wedding somehow. I couldn't be blessed with a better group of friends, of sisters, of family. To have you all be a part of my special day is a Godsend. There could never be enough thank you's to show how grateful I am for what each of you mean to me. Proverbs 18:24 A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Makeover Challenge Finalists

I have been such a horrible blogger lately. Most of you don't know that I normally blog on my lunch break from work as I don't have Internet access from home. Work has been very busy lately so I haven't had the change to blog much. But as promised we (me and my fdh) narrowed down our five favorites. So without further ado, here is the list:

  1. MarriedMomForGod
  2. A Marriage After His Heart
  3. Blending with Him
  4. For His Glory
  5. Marvelous In Our Eyes

The guest judges will be my two lovely little girls. They are excited about this process and so am I!! I will have the winners announced on Friday!! Thanks for participating. Have a blessed day!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Single Mom Make Over Contest

I am in need of a make-over. Well not me, but my blog is in need of a make-over. Being that in less than a month I will no longer be a single mom, I came to the conclusion that I am going to have to change my blog name. While I still have the desire to encourage single mother's out there, the fact still remains that while I won't be a single mom anymore there is still so much territory to cover in chronicling my transition into my new life. However, after many failed attempts at creativity I have decided (unlike another lady who's running for president,) to bow out gracefully in my attempt to rename my blog.


So, I am conducting a contest, give-a-way or whatever you would like to call it for the new name for my blog. The lucky winner will receive a $20 gift certificate from Amazon.com, ( sorry I wish I could afford the $200 one in the picture but alas I can't:) and the opportunity to guest post while I am away on my honeymoon.

The contest starts today and will end at midnight 05/22/08. My FDH, the girls and I will spend the Memorial Day Weekend choosing our favorites and the 5 finalist will be posted on Memorial Day for a panel of guest judges to choose. I will list the guest judges the same day as the finalist and the winner will be announced on 05/31/08. I will use the new name on 6/14/08, the morning of my wedding.

I am listing the rules here:
  1. Once you have read the post, leave a comment with your idea of a new name in the comments section.
  2. Contest starts today and will end on 05/22/08. Finalist will be named 05/27/05 and the winner will be named 05/31/08.
  3. Please only one entry per person
  4. Gift card will be emailed the same day as the announcement.

There have been so many women who have provided invaluable knowledge and points of views on so many touching topics. I (we) feel so blessed to have read so many informative posts and are eagerly awaiting the creative name for my blog.Thank you all in advance for participating and have fun!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

And The Months Go By............

I have been out of blog world lately on a little medical hiatus. I am happy to report that the surgery went well and I am now tattoo free!!!! Thank the Lord this ordeal is now closed and I can move on with my new life a burden lighter.


Time has seemed to have flown by so fast. I began my courtship in January and today marks the 1 month countdown to my wedding. I can't even begin to imagine where time has gone, all I know is that I have 30 days until I marry the man God personally created for me. While I have been caught up in a whirlwind of emotions, nothing epitomized the realness of this process than the day we went in to get our marriage license. This little piece of paper evoked a flood of emotions between the both of us. It finally set in for me that this is real, and in 30 days I won't be a single mom any longer. I will be a wife, a mother, a help meet, and a follower to the leader of my home. I have no regrets, no anxieties, no desire to reclaim the independence that I have so been ready to depart from.

I loved Terry's post on the need and biblical requirement of interdependence in a marriage. There have been many people who have asked me if I were going to hyphenate my last name and I so gladly reply NO!! I will be my father's daughter until June 14, on that date and thereafter I will be my husbands wife. There is no way I can obey scripture Matthew 19:5 ('For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'") if I still hold on to my father's name and try to join it with my husband as if he is a mere simple hyphenated addition to my father's legacy.
When I get married I have to leave that legacy and join with my husband to create a new one. This poses no problem or threat in fact it's a beautiful and scared requirement that I have prayed to long to fulfill. How can I honor my husband if I am not willing to accept his last name. While it is the norm for a huge majority of women in the professional world, or just the world per say to be Mrs. Such-And Such, I am glad that I no longer identify with this majority. Please remember to keep me in your prayers as the months and Lord willing years continue to go by....

Be Blessed and Stay encouraged

Sunday, May 11, 2008

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE LOVING MOTHERS OUT THERE. TODAY IS YOUR DAY! REST, RELAX, AND ENJOY TODAY TO THE FULLEST!

Monday, May 5, 2008

Last Nail In The Coffin

Last month I wrote a post about tattoos and the after effects in which you can read here. During my wild and rebellious hey day I stupidly got the stupidest tattoo ever imaginable. Now I am saved, engaged to be married in a little over a month, and I have the blessed opportunity to drive the final nail in the coffin that contains my sinful reminders that I don't want to take into my marriage. While even though he knows about this ugly little thorn in my side, I am not sure I want him to have to see my sin plastered all on my body for the rest of our lives so tomorrow, I am going to have my ugly little stupid tattoo surgically removed. Yep, I am going on the chopping block to have them give me a shot of local anesthetics, cut that tattoo off my top layer of skin and sew me back up. Sounds kinda gross, but for me it's a victory. I finally get the chance to get rid of the visual reminder of my sin graffiti.Yes, I know he will accept me the way I am, but this is one of those things that just needs to be buried. No funeral, no memorial, nothing but a plain casket and buried deep into the ground. I ask that you pray for me that this minor procedure will be just what it is: minor.

The more I type, the more I think about all of those sinful little skeletons that are dying to come out of the closet and rob us of our spiritual self esteem. Such is the case with me , and every time I look in the mirror I feel a overwhelming sense of shame and embarrassment. This my friends should not be. When I repented of my sins, they were cast as far as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12), so then why can't I accept that and allow him to cast the guilt and shame from those sins with them. We have to strive( especially as women) to allow those past guilty and shameful trash bags be tossed along with our sins because in essence they only rob us of the true joy and beauty that is associated with salvation.

Have a blessed week and keep me in your prayers. smfg

Friday, May 2, 2008

Weather: Science or Scripture??

Nahum 1:3 The LORD is slow to anger, and great in power, and will not at all acquit the wicked: the LORD hath his way in the whirlwind and in the storm, and the clouds are the dust of his feet.(KJV)

pictures taken from fox16news.com

It seems like lately my poor little state has had so many tornado's. We had one this morning that claimed the lives of seven( thus far). Many have lost their homes and businesses and are just left completely devastated. Some communities haven't recovered from the major twister we had earlier last month. You can read about that one and see the pictures here and here.

This is just a constant reminder to me of God's awesome and unexpected power. In the bible, the whirlwind is referenced 27 times. Of the 27 times it's referenced in Scripture, only twice is it not associated with God's fury. I sometimes ask myself if the recent and frequent acts of nature due to God's fury? Is there a message hidden in the whirlwinds, floods, earthquakes, tsunami's and wildfires? If indeed he is trying to send a message, are we getting it? Or are we so caught up in trying to disassociate the weather with it's prominent relevance in Scripture and associate it more with science?

Many seem to get angry when you associate weather with God but I can't help but to wonder in awe about the spiritual correlation. I'm not saying that God is punishing us with weather, but it's something about man, we just tend to forget to acknowledge his power and we tend to lean more towards scientific explanation. Just something to ponder the old noggin as I try to seek God more than I do the local weather man. And to think we had a low percent chance of rain just a few days ago and a killer tornado once again when we least expected it.

Also if you get a chance, check out my bloggy buddy Terry's Virtual Baby Shower over at Brenda's Place at the Family Revised. It's a treat and a wonderful way to start the weekend!

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

More Advice Solicitation

Okay, I have a need for more advice. I don't know if it's because I am getting married,or because everyone around me seems to be preganated ( as my friend calls it) but I have the baby itch...... I will admit, I know nothing at all about planning for a baby as I didn't plan to have either one of mine. And I don't really know how I feel about the topic of birth control. I know I don't believe in contraceptives of any kind, but I don't know how I feel about natural method, AND right not that's not what I am soliciting. My FDH wants a nice size family ( an old testament family as he so jokingly calls it) and of course I do to.

My dilemma that with my girls I worked so much that I missed out on so many milestones. I had great support from my parents, but honestly they raised my babies and not me. I was that mother that had to send them to daycare at 3 months and one at 5 wks, because I had to work and sometimes my work included traveling and or living away from my children ( military). My oldest was born the summer of my last semester of undergrad so I was able to stay with her a little longer, but then once the semester started I had to go away, and my littlest, well I took off so much due to complications, that I didn't have much leave time and I had to leave her at 5 wks. Shortly after she was born, I was called to active duty and had to leave them both for almost a year, that's not to mention how many other times I have had to leave them due to a demanding job. But that is the reality for many single women. You HAVE to work, sometimes you have to make a trade and its not easy. It's not easy when your baby looks to your parents when they are hurting, or sick, just plain old would rather be with them than you. It's not that they don't love you, they just aren't used to your 100% of time and nurturing. I could go on and on, but I wont. It's too painful, and it's the past.

Needless to say, I don't desire to do this again. EVER again. So I am soliciting advice for all those women who left the workforce to come home. I know I want to come home, and we are praying for the right time, but how did you do it? I would love to hear the stories and the encouragement. And being that we had such an explosive post going around last week about the values of being a keeper at home, especially within my race I would love to sop up all the teaching I can.

Monday, April 28, 2008

Breaking The Tradition

nee nee & mommy at her honor roll ceremony earlier this month!

Yesterday, my eight year old daughter Nee -Nee Pooh said the coolest thing to me. We were sitting at dinner and she was talking about what she wants to be when she grows up. She said, and I quote

Nee Nee: " Mommy, I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. Can I go to any college I want"
Me: " Sure "
Nee Nee: "I still don't know what I want to be, someone wants me to be a doctor, and I sometimes want to be a teacher, I just don't really know!"
Me: " Well, maybe you should start praying for God to show you what he wants you to be when you grow up, that may help."
Nee Nee: I think God just wants me to be a wife.
Me: *sniff, sniff* Yep, I believe that what he wants you to be too.... That's the best job!
I wont bore you with the entire conversation, but my little girl is showing interest in being a wife and homemaker and she has already called her grandparents to inquire how she should word her future wedding invitations.
A couple of years ago, I did and would still be trying to map her life out; honors classes, career planning by 10th grade, high school education with honors, then on to the top colleges for undergrad/graduate school. I would have probably start shoving the "anything a man can do, you can do better mentality down her throat", and I will admit, that I used to preach blatant independence in my house. None of my daughters would ever be totally dependent on a man,but God saw differently and Praise the Lord that he did!
It's a blessing to see that all the hot button posts last week were not in vain! I didn't know she read them, or listened to me talk to my FDH about our hot topic discussions, but I thank God for giving me a more clear direction to pray about and work on with my daughter. She will be turning 9 this summer , so I only have a little time left to teach her the things I didn't know but am learning through biblical knowledge and practical experiences through myself and others. I especially thank him for speaking through her, its always easier to teach someone who has a willing heart. Stay Blessed and Encouraged-smfg

Friday, April 25, 2008

50 Days

I wanted to take a break from my latest hot topic issue and use my blog today and send a message to my FDH. We have only 50 days before our wedding. Sometimes, time seems to fly by and we wonder where did the days go, and sometimes it seems to move at a snails pace and we wonder when will this day come to be, but looking back at my life, I wouldn't trade these 50 days for anything this world has to offer. All the wedding ceremony hooplah aside, how I feel below is all that matters right now.

In 50 days my life will change for the better. I will have a different calling for my life, a calling that can only make me a better woman for God and my family. I met you a mere 987 days ago. Sometimes 50 days seems like an eternity, but looking back a the 987 days since, 50 days seems minuscule. 987 days I have had the blessed opportunity to watch you grow into the man that God was shaping you to be now, a life time is what I will have to watch the finished product take its form. Watching the potter is an awesome thing, being half of the clay is even better. When the enemy tries to over throw us with how far away our day seems to be, we can remind him of the 987 days that God carried us through to bring us to these 50 days and counting ....... Always, your FDW

Have a Blessed weekend!

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Who Then Will Teach Us?

I was pondering a lot last night about the course of dialogue between myself, Terry and Mrs. Henderson yesterday. Between the three of us we had some pretty explosive point of views on the lack of African American keepers of the home. While it certainly was not my intent to sound so radical, I will be the first to say, I am the different one of the bunch. I work outside the home. Working for me is a necessity because I am one of the single parent statistics. Do I like working? NO, would I love to stay at home and be the mother God has called me to be? Absolutely! When I get married am I praying for God to open doors for me to say Hasta' La Vista' to corporate America? You better believe I am.

I believe with all my heart that we are all apart of God's kingdom, and we are all one race. However, the reality is that the society that we live in doesn't identify solely to the human race, we are different races, colors, cultures, ethnicity's and so forth. While I love all people regardless of any of the fore mentioned, I have to come to grips that God made me to fit in the African American box, it's who and what I relate to. I live with it every day and I have to accept that is what and who I am. I couldn't tell you what it's like to live the life of any other ethnicity but my own. So therefore I am passionate about the causes that affect my race. I am passionate about the causes that affect all people, but am I wrong for being passionate about the causes that affect the box that society labels me???

As we were driving to bible study last night, I asked my FDH if my post yesterday seemed a little radical? " A little" he replied. Good, I thought to myself. Sometimes it takes a little ruffling of feathers to get the truth out. This is one of those elephant's in the room that doesn't get addressed in our culture. Its a fact that if you are an educated, professional, young African American woman who opens her mouth to dare say, " I want to come out of the workforce and be a stay at home mom" I promise you will get more looks of amazement than you will get agreement. Being a keeper of the home is just not something that is widely taught in our culture. I guess my question is, who's responsibility is it to teach our women that it's not a negative stigma to stay at home and raise a family? Who will teach the God given responsibility? Is it the church's responsibility? Is it the community of Christian women who are following God's standard according to his word? Or should it be an individual experience, if your want it you have to get it for yourself? Who will stand against the often stated notion that the bible "wasn't written for this day and age? " Do we honestly think that God meant for his commandment for women to take care of their families only last during certain centuries? Are we to assume that the Prov 31 woman was only a example that had a 20th century expiration date?

I have heard from so many women that this simply isn't being taught in the church. Could it be because the more income a family has, the more tithes will be paid to the church? Or could it be a taboo sermon that will quickly get the pastor voted out? Could it be because no one is teaching the men that keepers at home doesn't equate laziness, and that you still have to treat your wife as Christ does the church? Or could it be that no one is pointing out how important we need our mamma's to be home to give hugs, kisses, advice, time, conversation and so much more? Who is exposing the invaluable worth in that?

I have so many questions and I have so much more that I would love to elaborate on, but unfortunately my lunch break is over and I must return back to work . If you get a chance check out the remainder of the dialogue over at Terry's place.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Who's to Blame?

I've been MIA the past couple of days ( no time to blog) and am back with a whole lot to say today. My good friends Terry and Mrs. Henderson have had the most interesting dialogue about the history behind the lack of African American keepers of the home. You can read both their post here and here. They were both 150% correct in their statements, and as a single mom as much as the truth burns it's still truth. Fact of the matter is, there are more opportunities for women of other races to stay at home than it is in our race. Why? Well because unfortunately we do have a phenomenally high rate of single parent homes. There is no one else to work and provide income. We are somewhat behind and not always educated on ways to make money from home so we can leave the workforce. I guess the question is who's to blame for this cycle?

Is it the sinful young woman and man who are both so bound by sin that they can't resist the temptation of fornication? Or is it the devil who is on his job to kill, steal, and destroy?
Is it the government with their welfare reform during the days of LBJ or slavery/Jim Crow because black women then were raised to be subservient to others more than they were to their own households? We all have heard the stories of the mammies, and the maids raising the "rich white folks children". ( no offense, just stating historical quotes)

Or is it the race to not be poor and the overwhelming flood of middle and upper class blacks who with all their hard work showed us that we can become educated and be viewed as first class citizens in America's class system ? We can send our sons and daughters to non HBCU's and Ivy league schools so that they can be a little more leveled on this un-leveled playing field. What about Affirmative Action that opened doors for black women to go to school/work and to obtain degrees/ promotions so that they could make a half way decent living, all the while either sending their children to day care and pre-school or forsaking family all together? And lets not forget the Civil Rights act that gave black men and women equal opportunity in advancing in and obtaining career status, again so they would not be poor and would grow to look down upon the people they no longer connect with.


Or is it gross negligence on the black churches who for some reason seem to be found on almost every corner sometimes an entire street and just shows the world how unified our infamous "Black Christian faith" really is? Or is it the demise of honest preachers and ministers truly living what they preach, and truly being called by God and not Seminary to preach? Nowadays the only thing people tend to go to church for is to pay the preacher who's house and bank account is full of filthy lucre to hear a feel good motivational sermon that can't last more than an hour or the church will start clock watching and vote him out, all the while we have a choir full of sinners who can sang now, and everyone is a part of some type of board or committee. Don't get mad at me yet, I am just speaking what is spoken and seen from the mouths and eyes of the sinner folk. No messages that really put bible judgment, no crying out against the sins, just a simple it's okay, you can do it over and over again and still God loves you- He knows your heart.

I firmly believe its a combination of all of the above. Mainly the latter! The church through black history has always played a pivotal role in the black community. I agree with both Terry and Mrs. Henderson that the problem lies with sin. But if someone tells you that you can repent of your sins, remain saved for the rest of your life, but still sin every so often because no man but Jesus can live sin free; why would you want salvation? Why would you want deliverance from sin, when the person selling you the deliverance is telling you you can't really be delivered? If no one is preaching and teaching the concept of the "keeper of the home" then how will future generations of young African American women desire it?

I will continue this post tomorrow but I want to ask a question. Isn't this being done? Can anyone see how hard it must be for a person to want to be saved but doesn't see any true example of salvation as the bible give us? Or are we promoting the sinners misconception of the church by part taking in a congregation who's testimony isn't what is should? And last but not least what have we done lately as Christian women to help these sinners that we talk about so much choose Christ and salvation?

Friday, April 18, 2008

Its Friday!!!

Well good friends, we have made it to another Friday/weekend. Whooo Hooo! Thank you so much for your advice yesterday and today as I type I am sipping on a bottle of water. I have made it a commitment to try and drink more water and to encourage my kids to do the same. My mother so graciously and bluntly pointed out in her comment yesterday that I need to change my not so healthy habits as my children are watching and listening. With that being said, I posted a video that was sent to me today that further served as a confirmation that I just need to get up and accept the changes I need to make. Children watch us, and they listen to us and eventually they become us. I want healthy daughters and I want to be around for them as long as I can. My body is not mine but the Lord's and I must take care of it even if it means drinking water when I would rather have a strong root beer :)
Have a glorious spring weekend. My boss has decided to be gracious and allow me to leave three hours early so that I can get some much needed wedding stuff done ( I am going to purchase my veil, hair piece and slip today!) and I am going to try and enjoy the beautiful April shower free weather that is predicted for us! Oh yeah, did anyone know that Mc Donald's has the cutest .24 micro mini kids cones? They don't advertise them, but if you ask for them they will make them for you. They look almost like sample cones, and my kids don't mind the size they have a blast laughing about how tiny they are. Just thought I would let you know in case you were looking for a way to spend a sunny weekend afternoon for less than a quarter per child.

video

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Help Wanted

Okay I am going to run the risk of sounding vain and insecure, but I need help and advice from anyone who feels led to submit it on three detrimental ( in my mind) issues that I am facing. My wedding is less than two months away and I am having the most severe bout of acne. Part of the problem is I have really oily skin. Another part is I have a very nervous habit of putting my hands on my face when I am thinking and this causes me to break out in every spot my hand has touched, especially around my upper lip and chin area.I try so hard to keep my hands away from my face, but I feel like a child who can't stop sucking their thumb. I have tried almost everything on the market and am moving back towards Pro-Activ. I don't really like it but it does work, if you use it religiously. The moment you stop then its back to square one. Does anyone know of any type of natural yet inexpensive product that I can use???

Secondly, I need any cool advice on how to incorporate water into my diet. I hate it, I don't drink enough and I know that its a parallel to my acne problem. But I need some tips or something that I can use to help me stay motivated to drink more water

Last but not least, I now have a weight gain issue. They say love will make you gain weight. I say planning a wedding will make you gain weight. Every since I started taking a multivitamin from GNC with my prescription iron and 1300 mg of biotin, I have been starving. The biotin is actually working with growing my hair and making it stronger, but I believe everything else is increasing my appetite. All I do is eat. All day and its a hunger craving that I have never experience. I am gaining all of my weight in my stomach and with my size and frame it's very obvious. My clothes don't fit right and I just feel slouchy because if I try to move up a size some things fit too big in the wrong places and I look as if my clothes are just hanging off me.Or things look to tight in the tummy area and I start looking very first almost beginning of second trimesterish.
Yep, I even have people thinking I am getting married so soon because I am expecting. I am trying so hard to fit an exercise routine into my schedule but I just can't seem to squeeze the time in. The wedding has literally taken over my spare time. I tried on my dress the other day once my shoes came in ( BTW they are so cute) and all I could see was stomach pouch. I look eternally bloated. Is this nerves or what??? I mean I am not really overly concerned with appearance, but I am a woman and I do want to look good on my wedding day, or am I overreacting??

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The Independent Lie

Single motherhood is synonymous with independence. For the past 8 years of my life, I have grown to be a fiercely independent woman. For the longest, I pretended that I really never wanted to be married. I didn't have to answer to anyone, could go and come as I please and I could be the driver of my own ship sort of speak and bible wifely submission was just a couple of words that churned my stomach acid. I remember just over a year ago, I was having a very candid debate about women being the weaker vessel equating women being weak. As most feminist, I was perpetrating, I was really lonely and envious and I desperately longed for a husband and family; but wanted to show the world that I wasn't waiting around to be rescued. Thankfully God saw how foolish and unlearned I sounded and he decided I needed a make-over.

So one day while surfing the web doing research on this topic of the "weaker vessel", I came across my first blog about biblical womanhood. That dear folks, is when my life changed. God began to deal with me through my research and through other blogs. I began to read how these other women were blissfully submissive and for whatever reason it registered with me. So I began to self search my feminist ways and figured out that I like most women my age was bamboozled by the perpetuating lie of the happy independent single woman (who just so happens to be a mom!) My independence had almost blinded me spiritually and my humility was at an all time low. And the whole weaker vessel thing, well I have a new outlook on that: It takes a strong person to accept a comfortable spot in being the weaker vessel, humbleness does not equate strength, it equates love and respect,honor and glory.

My friend Terry sums it up ever so nicely in her post yesterday about her relationship with her husband and how bible submission works in their home. As I read, I felt touched to share her post. Looking back a year later, I am so happy that I submitted my independence to the Lord. I am so happy that he revealed the miserable lie that I was living. As a reflection I can see how he had to lead me through blog land to read the personal testimonies of so many wise women, I wonder sometimes, if I had not had a willing heart or mind, how unhappy and deceived I would still be, I wouldn't be marrying the man He created for me in less than two months, my spiritual life wouldn't be as vibrant as it is, and I would have missed out on a wonderful life. I will post a small expert from her post. The rest you can read here.

"To answer your question: In order for the husband to lead in a marriage, the wife has to submit freely and voluntarily. The husband's ability to lead is more about the wife's willingness to obey Scripture than it is about his ability to force his own way. In the early years I'd pretend to submit while simply doing what I wanted without the hubby's knowledge. After the Lord convicted me, I confessed and committed to submit to my husband's authority."

Be Blessed and Encouraged!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Can We Raise Spritually Vulnerable Children?

This morning while catching a glimpse of Good Morning America (watch it here) , I was able to see an interview conducted with the mothers in the midst of the Polygamy investigation. I must say that I was heartbroken. I promise I won't try to sound harsh and or judgmental, and will try my best to keep this short and sweet because what I feel for these women are a deep sense of sympathy. No loving mother deserves to have her child taken away from her, but I had to really ask myself if the mothers honestly realized if the environment was really a healthy environment for their children or a true Godly enviornment for that matter.

I must admit, it is really hard for me to grasp or think about raising my 8yr old daughter to be given to marriage at the age of 14, to a man thrice her age or more. I just simply can't imagine that and it makes me cry to even think about it. In watching the women in the interview it made me pray earnestly for Godly wisdom on how to raise my daughters not to be vulnerable to deception. I know that mainstream media classifies this church as a cult, and from the interview I saw I can see how and why they would think this; and personally I agree. I can't see a true minister of God wanting to procreate with young children and offspring especially when the bible speaks against it. I can't see a biblical mother giving her young daughter to be espoused to her father or any other man just because she is told to do so by any one other than God( and he wouldn't give instructions contrary to his word!). I may be wrong to some for saying it , but I just can't grasp it.

It is my heartfelt belief that we have to raise our children to be aware of scripture and to know and understand it for themselves. I see so often where children are raised in a Christian environment and they have a biblical doctrine fed to them from infancy but they don't fully know, digest, or understand the spiritual food that they are being fed. This type of misunderstanding is exactly what the enemy will use to sow seeds of biblical doubt and make it easier for our children to be deceived by strange doctrine ( Heb 13:9).

I also believe that sometimes we should be open minded and know what other religions and doctrines stand for however; our children may not be ready or mature enough to handle such knowledge. We must teach our children as God leads us, and not only teach them the doctrines and instructions given to us by and from God, we must teach them and show them how to develop and nurture their personal relationship with God so that they can know when the enemy is leading them astray. I have seen and known of people who were led into all kinds of false doctrines and its sad. It starts with a curiosity of other religions and then it becomes interesting, and then possibly leads to something darker than what they can handle and they become overthrown and lost sometimes. I'm not saying that its wrong to know about other religions and teachings, we just have to know undoubtedly where God wants us according to his will. It's sad to see someone practice the occult, or to be so wrapped up in man made religions that they fear and obey man before they fear and obey God and nothing in the practice is according to scripture.

I won't even pretend to know or desire to know anything about the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, or say anything openly negative about its secular practices, I can only say that I offer my prayers to these women and children whose lives are completely torn upside down. If you think I am wrong, please let me know. I am just protective of the souls that I will be held accountable for. To know that I as a mother could be deceived into raising my children according to mans law and not God's is a scary, scary thought for me and I pray that I remain hidden under the mercy , grace and knowledge of his love. I want my children to be so close to God that if they see me living anything contrary to God's word that they can point it out and stand against it and help win me back to the straight and narrow.
Be Blessed and Encouraged!

Monday, April 14, 2008

Haven Challenge Anti Procrastination Day!

Crystal over at Biblical Womanhood has deemed today Anti- Procrastination Day and I don't even know where to start. I guess I will start by creating a list on all the things that I need to do and have not done yet since wedding planning has taken over my life temporarily . You can check out her post here!

Things I need to Do ( in no particular order)
  1. Organize Closets
  2. Donate clothing bags to Goodwill
  3. Donate Books to library or school
  4. My ever growing laundry pile
  5. My weekly menu's and sticking to them!
  6. Coupon Clipping
  7. Bathroom Re-organization
  8. Wedding Dress Alterations
  9. Purchasing Flower Girl Dresses
  10. Resuming my work-out schedule/plan
  11. Deep cleaning girls room
  12. Kitchen re-organization
  13. Apply for my replacement birth certificate for my marriage license
  14. Apply for marriage license
  15. Create a photo album with all the hundreds of pictures around our house
  16. Develop disposable camera film that is probably over two years old
  17. Developing anad sticking to our chore chart
  18. Developing and sticking to our household planner
  19. Develop extra homework/summer learning chart/wall for kids

My Rambling Thoughts on Rings and Things

note: my views today represent my own views on a topic that the Lord has given me specific direction and by no means is casting judgment or condemnation to others who don't agree.footprint graphic from art.com

Today while I was passing out invitations I was bombarded with the same question over and over again, "How big is your ring?""Where is your ring" I could feel the looks from some going from "happy for you" to "oh my ,what kind of man is he??"

Well, I don't have an engagement ring, and I don't wear jewelry. It's part of my biblical conviction and part of my deliverance. You see, I used to be one of those women who was very superficial and materialistic. I dated guys who I expected to shower me with trinkets who's meaning was just as superficial as our love/lust.
I know that may sound extreme to many but; I when I first stared battling with modesty I kept reading the scripture I Peter 3:1-5. God was then showing me what he required of me, once I accepted his word then this issue was no longer a battle for me. Also, once I really was healed of all of my hurt and pain from my past sinful life, and I started seeking God to prepare me for the man that he had for me, this particular passage of scripture kept coming to mind.

Before, I was everything opposite of a meek and quiet spirit and (I am still ever learning and perfecting this Godly attribute) and I so desperately wanted to have what this passage of scripture signifies. Still, I would have people say "that's crazy, God doesn't require all of that from you!" But you know what, he did and he still does because he showed it to me in scripture, and once he has shown you something for your good ( notice I said your) then you have to measure up.( Philippians 3: 13-15 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, 14 forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. 15 Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you.)

I know that there are commandments that God expects all the world to uphold and there is no way around them, they are clear, concrete, and unarguable. However, I do believe that God knows each and every one of us, and when he delivers us into salvation he knows the things from our past which were/are strongholds, and just as he wanted Lot and his family to leave Sodom and Gomorrah without looking back he wants us to do the same. It could be so simple as and something that we don't see a sin, but it could be something that isn't pleasing to him.
That's the catch, we tend to think we have the right to say what is and what isn't pleasing to God, but what about what He thinks that isn't pleasing? We could very well have something in our lives that is no where near sin as we would categorize it, but God simply doesn't feel that it is a right fit in our relationship with him so he tells us to let it go, and we have to let it go. This is how it was for me with certain things concerning modesty. Not only did I let my makeup, jewelry, short skirts, colored nail polish, and pants go but I let all those things in my life that were not reflective of a meek and quiet spirit.

Now my answer to those pesky questions about my ring, well I know without and ounce of doubt that my FDH is the man created for me. I know confidently that our courtship was scripted by God, and our marriage will be fully ordained by God , and at this point and stage in my life I don't need a ring to validate or signify that for me. Seeing as nowadays a ring doesn't always really hold marital value in our modern day culture, I will be simply happy with knowing that my husband fears God and his fear for God will keep him in love with me and treating me according to how God ordains for the husband to treat his wife.For me, a piece of metal does not make me more or less married than the next person. This may not be the case for others but its no more/ no less for me.
Be Blessed and Encouraged!

Friday, April 11, 2008

Frugal Friday- Frugal Wedding Planning Resources

Once again I am going to try to keep up with Crystal over at Biblicalwomanhood and her weekly Frugal Friday post. One thing I am learning about this wedding planning thing is how to make the most of frugality. I believe a wedding should be a beautiful affair glorifying God's testimony of bringing two of his children together, what I don't believe is that God would be pleased with a over priced wedding ceremony that does not show a testament of being a good steward of the money he has blessed you with. So I prayed and sought ways to make my dream day as frugal as possible with out looking as frugal as possible staying in my modest $4,000 budget. I will admit, there is one area that I splurged on and that is rental. I rented most of my tablecloths, candelabras, columnnade, and other huge stuff. But for the most part I utilized these outlets:

Walmart
Hobby Lobby
Save-on- Crafts.com
Oriental Trading
DollarTreeDirect.com
Sams Club
Chadwicks of Boston
Burlington Coat Factory
Knot.com
Walmart- I bought all of my fabric from Wal-Mart's clearance fabric all of my fabric for the swags was $1 a yard. I had to go to a few Wal-Mart's a couple of time to find the type of fabric that I wanted but I found it and it was very inexpensive. I also bought the vases for my centerpieces there and my invitations. I found my invitations on clearance for $7 a box.
Hobby Lobby- I bought all of my flowers from Hobby Lobby's clearance sale. They were running a 50% off on all their floral bushes and bouquets, and since I am using roses, I had them special order all of the flowers that I needed for my day. I then went back a few weeks ago and took advantage of their 50% bridal sale. This was the mother of all sales for me and I loaded up with all of my bridal stuff and favors and again it was relatively inexpensive.
Save-on- Crafts.com- I found some really cool deals on here, but for the most part I did better at Hobby Lobby. My decorator and I decided to have my reception a different color than my wedding, so we are having an all white reception. It was cheaper and easier to find white fabric than my colors, which are champagne, cream, and chocolate. I also decided to use Calla lilies in my centerpieces which I ordered here for less than $1 each. I also bought my organza tulle at a very reasonable discount price here also.
Oriental Trading- They have some very inexpensive wedding favors, I haven't ordered yet, but there are a few things I am thinking of picking up.
Dollar Tree Direct- Dollar tree is one of my favorite stores, I can use them to buy most of my serving pieces here. Dollar tree in bulk is a dream!!!
Sams Club- I will probably purchase the food and or other items I can't find at Dollar tree in bulk. Not my first choice though.
Chadwicks of Boston- Very nice and a few modest bridesmaid dresses here! I wanted my bridesmaids to have nice modest dresses for a fraction of the cost that we were finding online, plus there was no long shipping turn around. I never knew that finding modest formals was so difficult and expensive!!! But we found a few here to choose from and I am totally satisfied with the product.
Burlington Coat Factory- I found my daughter's dresses here, and they had an awesome after Easter sale!!! A nice place to shop if you have the patience to hunt through the crowds of clearance stuff!
Honeymoonwishes.com- A nice alternative registry that allows guest to purchase items for the couples honeymoon. Most couples already have tons of housewares, and traditional bridal registry items, this registry allows guests to take part in blessing the couple to have a wonderful honeymoon. For Christian couples this is a God send since we are actually having an opportunity to take advantage of the real purpose of a honeymoon. It's refreshing to know that there are people out there who are partaking in the sanctity of the marriage bed as God has instructed!
Knot.com Last but not least, this was my most helpful site. I was able to send out e-vites and electronic save the dates for free. I was also able to set up a website detailing my courtship story. It is an excellent planning tool and you can even upload your guest list in it and your guest can RSVP online. It also has a spot for your online registries for those guest who may not be able to attend or have time to actually visit a store. And people can leave nice things about you on your guest book.
I know many of you may already know about this, but it was fun for me to discover and share. And I would love to hear if you have any ideas or advice for any better deals or places! Thank you all who have left comments on our wedding web page, it's truly a blessing.
Stay blessed and encouraged! Have a wonderful weekend.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Weather Update

Hello All, its that time of year here in the good old state of Arkansas. Springtime is very nice and beautiful but occasionally we go through a season of tornado weather and fierce thunderstorms and flash flooding.

Last night was pretty okay, we just had thunderstorms early in the night and it stormed pretty solid this morning. We did have a little scare this am around lunchtime the tornado sirens went off and we had to assume evacuation mode. For all of you SAHM's I envied you today. Today while I was sitting in the stairwell of my office building, my children were at school in evacuation for a little while. Its the worst feeling in the world to know that there is a potential natural disaster going on and your precious ones are afraid and possibly in danger and you are miles away under the strong arm of attendance rules and regulations. God is blessing though. He kept my little ones safe and sound and he kept my FDH safe and sound.

If you look at my count down I actually have 65 days to go before my wedding and planning has become a little more manageable. I am still in prayer and decision on a cater. God worked it out that we were able to find a nice photographer that was so thrilled with our story of courtship and our "no touching stand" that he volunteered to take engagement pictures so that we could see his work and so that he could find creative poses to photograph all for free. I was thrilled and happy with the results, so all in all we were blessed to find a wonderful photographer who was excited about our courtship and the Godliness thereof and wants to be a part of our special day.

Now moving on along to my actual feelings about my impending marriage, well there are so many emotions that I am dealing with, fear, frustration, anticipation, excitement, love, did I mention fear??? I am afraid that I won't be a good wife. I am so used to being a mom full time, that I sometimes wonder how in the world am I going to add wife to my plate. Don't get me wrong I am looking forward to the challenge, but I do have a quiet fear, a Godly fear that in some way is keeping me humbly before him for help and guidance. I am learning in practice the art of womanly submission. It's not a bad thing, it's wonderful but I will say that it requires tons of effort. Some may say that it should be effortless, and I agree but when you have been used to making all decisions, it requires some gentle reminders from God that total decision making is not your place right now! So, pray for me, that I continue to remain humble and ever learning what it takes to be the wife I have so long waited to be.
Stay Blessed and Encouraged-smfg

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

100th Post!!!

Today is my 100th post and I am so grateful to God for allowing me this outlet to praise him, make new friends, encourage others, and come in contact with so much divine wisdom from so many people from across the world. I was looking at my feed map and am touched daily by the different visits from across the world. I am truly blessed.

I planned on typing this elaborate post last week, but as I sat huddled up in my bathtub with my two children while we experienced out first ever real live tornado last Thursday night I was hit with a new perspective; I was overcome with thankfulness and awe of just how mighty the hand, no the finger of God is. Last week, there was a
tornado that ripped through my community and left a path of devastation. The funny thing is, this particular tornado was different from any I have ever seen or witnessed. Normally, I am just on the tornado watch end, but the city that I moved to last year just so happens to be in our tornado alley, so this was my first time experiencing one close up. I was expecting high winds and hail and such, but this night the air was still and quiet, and had it not been for the warning sirens I wouldn't have even known to look out for anything. My kids automatically went into the bathroom and I stood one foot in my bedroom, one foot in my bath watching the news as they gave street by street directions of the tornado's path. When I heard them say that it was headed in my direction, I was thinking " this must be the quietest tornado ever" No sooner as the words left my brain, I hear a ripping crack of thunder and a blinding ray of lightning as if the heavens were opening, and the storm gates flooded. This tornado was surrounded by the thunderstorm, you couldn't see it because it was hidden by a blanket of rain and hail. I literally was able to experience the calm before the storm. But there was no loss of power, just a really intense thunderstorm and then it was gone.

Little did I know that about 1/8th of a mile from my house ( practically in my back yard) the tornado ripped through a housing community and trailer park. The lightning struck a gas main that set off fires destroying over 70 mobile homes. I stood out on my balcony and watched the ball of fire and the fire department extinguishing the blazes. Soon after we had to leave because another storm cell was heading our way and I live on the 2nd story of my apartment complex so my FDH who had just gotten off work decided that it would be best if we waited the storm out at one of our friends homes. It was late and dark when we returned home, but the next morning on my way to work I was able to see the damage, and I was so humbled at what I saw. I showed my girls and I told them this " This is why mommy serves God, do you see how he protected us!" There were trees uprooted, homes leveled, and many people displaced. All lived in a development right behind us. The tornado skipped over us and went right behind where we live. I serve an awesome God. There were also church members of mine who were fellow shipping at another members home, and the tornado touched down in their neighborhood. They came out to see uprooted trees and debris, but not a single one of them suffered any damage to their vehicles or the home. God is truly good to his people. I am still claiming his goodness, because this is just the beginning of the season for us, as a matter of fact we have tornado like conditions forecasted for tonight and tomorrow.

funnel clouds hidden in the rain
Lightning right before the storm
areal view of the storm damage on my street
entrance to the community behind my apt bld
more storm damage
Sometimes we hear of disasters on the news and yes we may say a prayer, but so experience the awesome greatness of how God moves and works will forever be a humbling miracle for me. Above are some pictures of what happened behind my house and I will dedicate my 100th post to my heavenly father who once again spared me an my family from known and unknown dangers. I would also like to once again thank all of you for reading and leaving comments. You make my day brighter! Be Blessed and Stay Encouraged-smfg

*photos taken from arkansasonline.com and fox16com

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

State of The World

I have been a little out of sorts lately and unable to blog as frequently. Between the wedding plans and work I have been a little thinly stretched. But never fear, I have a nice little topic that I want to talk about today. I was working on a post for my bloggy friend Terry, a nice Q&A that I wanted to share, but today I read something that just sent my chills up my spine and made the hairs on my neck stand up, thus ending up in my current state of fingers flying on my keyboard.

I want to share a scripture first, before I lead into what I want to shout from my soap box. Luke 5:26And they were all amazed, and they glorified God, and were filled with fear, saying, We have seen strange things to day.

Today I most most certainly seen and read some strange things, things so strange that it makes me praise God all the more for being delivered out of the modern day Sodom and Gomorrah. I first thought it was a hoax, or just a publicity stunt when I read an article about a pregnant Oregon man. Then much to my chagrin, I find out today that this man(woman) will debut on Oprah tomorrow. Well that just seems like the type of stuff that she would have on her show, and you can probably tell that I am not her biggest fan. So apparently this woman, who has had a operation to make her a man outwardly, decided to keep her female organs. She/He married a woman, who knew he was a she, and fast forward to an unfortunate situation of the couple being unable to have children, the husband decides to fall back on the reproductive organs that he never had removed to carry his wife's child. I am confused and bewildered just typing this, and I wonder if I am this confused, what will this poor child have to endure.
I try not to be judgemental on my blog, but an abomination is just what it is, an abomination. These are the things that I have to explain to my children. This is the state of the world. A woman can decided that she wants to be a man, another woman will marry her under the name of love, and then the woman who wants to be a man, decides that its okay to cash in on the very maternal instinct that she doesn't want to portray outwardly. I find this incomprehensible, and just plain old offensive to me as a woman, a mother, a child of God.

So now for the next few days or weeks headlines will read Oreg an Man Pregnant, or something of that nature as if this is just something that is miraculous or a work of God. I find it equally disgusting that the news media is just banking on this, promoting this twisted story. I wonder what effect this will have on other transgender men to decide that they want to change outside but stay feminine inside and thus have a wave of so called men giving birth. I can only conclude that we are definitely in the last and evil days. I also feel that this is something that we need to be prepared to discuss with our children. We need to drive home that they will start to see things that are strange, and that all strange things they see are not all works of God but are a fulfilment of the scripture. Jude 1:8 Likewise also these filthy dreamers defile the flesh, despise dominion, and speak evil of dignities. You can read the articles here and here.
Be Blessed and Stay encouraged!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Spring Break and Putting It All In Perspective

The end of spring break is almost near, so I am taking a couple of days off to spend with these precious angels of mine.
Chocolate Drop and her famous toothless smile *smile*Nee Nee Pooh in all of her sweetness- I only have 10yrs left *sigh*


My perspective- Thank You Lord!

They are at grannie and pa-pa's and the plan was initially, that while they were gone,I would redecorate ( really a nice way of saying clean their room) their room. I thought initially about just getting rid of all their junk and making it easier for them to manage, and then yesterday I read this post (please read) by Crystal over at Biblical womanhood. This poor sister lost her dear husband of only 10 weeks in a unexpected boating accident. Wow, I thought, I am getting married to the man I love in less than three months, I am fretting over wedding plans and the attitudes of others whom I will never be able to change, and this poor woman just lost her husband of only 10 weeks. The Lord was faithful in sending me a reality check! Life is too short to be overly concerned with the cares, the messes, the never ending to-do lists. Their room can wait, we will redecorate it together. So I encourage you all to spend the remainder of the week in honor of Kristy and her husband, by spending dear time with those you love. Forget all the aimless chores and tasks that you won't remember once they are not around. Be blessed and stay encouraged! Have a wonderful weekend. And please if you have a moment, stop by and visit Kristy's blog to leave words of encouragement during this difficult time for her.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Bridal Thoughts and Prayer

Today I will simply share my "bridal prayer and thoughts". I ask that you continue to pray for me that God will keep me grounded and centered during this frenzy of wedding planning. I have come to the conclusion that marriage is a beautiful thing and a marriage ceremony should reflect that beauty both behind the scenes and forefront. I am a very laid back and glass half full person who believes that everything happens according to the will of God in its due time, and that there is really no need to stress or rush through things because when God is truly in it it will be according to his will. However, I am finding that my particular way of thinking doesn't always coincide with wedding planning and the fine details involved. Yes I want a beautiful affair, but should I trade my sanity in the process? While nothing particularly bad has happened, I feel sad that the planning stages of a wedding don't always reflect that beauty that I feel it should. And this is not just with my wedding but with any typical, average or normal wedding. It has become the acceptable norm that wedding planning is "just stressful", and that it "brings out the best and worst in people and you really find out who your friends are". I think that I have probably heard those two quotes more that I can stand to bear. Is this what one day is all about? I say it shouldn't be. It shouldn't cost an arm and a leg, it should be hard to find modest clothing, it shouldn't be hard to choose something likable by all, it just shouldn't be hard or frustrating at all, and by all means it shouldn't be something that will break up friendships or cause family grudges or grudges period! I sometimes believe that our desire for perfection and the perfect day can walk that fine line of just plain old leaving God out of the process and not upholding what his desire for the perfect day is. Scripture plainly states that " God is not the author of confusion but of peace( 1 Corinthians 14:33)" so I can't help but wonder that if there is confusion in planning and communications where lies the place that God hasn't authored??Since I am the bride, I feel responsible to search out any place that God isn't in, and bring him there. I am learning that if you don't put God first in all things concerning that it can be a very un-goldy process. So today I pray this prayer... I ask that you pray for me and my fdh as we continue in this process.


Dear Gracious and Heavenly Father,

I thank you for allowing me to have the opportunity to partake of your beautiful and sacred union that was created by you for your glory. I ask that you give me the grace to always keep you first and foremost in this journey. Help me not to forget you as we plan this wedding. Help me to always remember that it is we ( you and I ) not me, who is planning this for your glory and honor. I thank you for the people that you have brought into my life that possess so much valuable input, talents, and gifts. I thank you for allowing those same people to have the desire to contribute these gifts to our blessed day. I also ask that you will give me the wisdom to recognize when the devil is trying to throw a trap into our plans and to immediately go in prayer to bind and stand firmly against him. Help me not to get caught up into the worldly process of wedding planning, and help me maintain the right attitude at all times for all situations, help me to hide my feelings and keep my words seasoned with grace. Help me to always be conscience of your voice and to hear it before making any decision or statement. I know that of myself I may feel my attitude is correct, but help me maintain your attitude through out this. Help me guard my feelings, my mind, and my thoughts as the enemy tries to bring thoughts and imaginations that sometimes seem difficult to cast down. I know that I possess the power in your word to cast down every thought and imagination and high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of you, and bringing into captivity EVERY thought to the obedience of Christ( II Corinthians 10:4-5). And finally Lord, I thank you for giving me this needed outlet of blogging. I thank you how time after time, you allow me to read something that is truly needful and edifying to my soul that is posted by one of your servants. I thank you for imparting in their hearts the very thing that may be uplifting to the souls that read, and I thank you for their obedience to share the thoughts that you lay on their hearts. I ask that you grant me the grace to be the same blessing to others as those that you send my way are to me. I thank you again and will never cease to praise you. Amen.
With that being said, I feel better already. Have a wonderfully blessed day!-smfg